With holidays on the horizon, you may be wondering how to incorporate minimalism into gift giving traditions. As nice as it would be to convince your family about the benefits of minimalism for their lives, it’s unlikely that you’ll have converts before gifts are given. As such, here are a few tips for navigating this dilemma:
1. Share your desire for different gifts
Whether your loved ones know about your minimalist journey or not, they may be unaware of your shift in mindset when it comes to giving and receiving – that’s why it’s key to express the types of gifts you’d now prefer:
- Experiences (i.e. massage, pottery classes, museum tickets, etc.)
- Consumable goods (i.e. coffee beans, chocolate, wine, etc.)
- Donations in your name to a favorite charity
- [fill in the blank with your preferred gift]
Take these conversations as an opportunity to explain why your mindset has shifted without placing judgement on their choices. It’s a chance to share the value you’ve found in reducing clutter, and how the types of gifts you requested would bolster that journey.
2. Start a gift list tradition
One way to build on those conversations (or circumvent them entirely) is to recommend gift lists – this way each individual can express exactly what they’re hoping to receive. Not only does this cut down on unwanted presents, it makes the job of giving easier for everyone.
Although you may be worried about the surprise factor being lost, in my own experience the anticipation and joy of the moment is still there – without the worry of receiving something you don’t care to own.
3. Rid yourself of unwanted gifts
Even if you shared exactly what you’d like to receive, chances are that someonewillstill give you a gift that doesn’t bring beauty or value to your life. When that happens:
- Thank them for their thoughtfulness.
- Donate/Sell/Recycle the item.
Clearly it’s not always this simple – especially since most gifts are from loved ones. As such, here are a few common challenges, and my thoughts regarding them:
- “They’ll be mad that I didn’t keep this!” – No* gift-giver wants a present to weigh you down. In the off chance it comes up in conversation, remind them of your appreciation for their thought/generosity, and gently explain why you didn’t keep the item.
- “Someday I’ll use this.” – This is a lie. Save yourself the guilt and clutter by donating the item right away.
- “I’ll forget that memory if I discard this.” – If a card, drawing, or trinket doesn’t bring value or beauty to your physical space but carries memories and sentiment, consider taking a picture of the item before throwing it away. The memory will always be in your head, but if you still want a prompt, you’ll have it digitally.
In Practice
A gift that took me over ten years to part with was the Fender Stratocaster my parents gave me as a teenager. Despite never learning to play the instrument (apart from some basic chords), I lugged it from apartment to apartment thinking “one day I’ll learn to play”. What I failed to realize until earlier this year was that I had guilt, disappointment, and failure tied up in that object. I was holding onto something that brought me down instead of bringing me value. In the end I was able to sell the guitar to someone who would truly enjoy the instrument.
Despite knowing when a gift should be parted with, as evidenced in my experience, it’s not always easy. If you continue to struggle with the process, cut yourself some slack and take the journey one step at a time. Minimalism isn’t an endpoint but rather a set of principles which can improve our lives – impacting everything from decor to money to gifts.
*If someone you know makes you feel guilty for what you did/didn’t do with the gift they gave you, it’s a sign that you should reconsider that friendship.